[He really preferred not to end up at this moment so soon - not now. But Rachel echoing his own words I loved you was ironic and frustrating and fitting, that he should deserve being in this situation now with her. But she was here - and he couldn't, he couldn't lie to her. He knew, just like he knew a year ago that he lost had lost her.

But no matter how much he tried to tell himself, convince himself that it was over and a thing of the past, no matter how much he tried repeating the same lines he sang at Regionals =

Nothing really matters, anyone could see, nothing really matters to me -

Now, with Rachel Berry standing in front of him he couldn't say he didn't love her. It wouldn't do her any justice]

I don't. I don't expect you to believe anything I say, Rachel. I didn't say anything didn't I?

[And suddenly it's Run Joey Run again, and suddenly he's in a dark room and his girlfriend has Finn featured on her video when she told him it was their thing. And it was always Finn - Finn who was the cause of their break up and Finn that had somehow didn't manage to keep Rachel - and Rachel who was undeniably the only one who he could talk to, be carefree with. The only girl he cared - loved enough to want to protect - from Shelby, from everyone - and eventually he did it all himself]

I won't say it, as per your request. It doesn't make it less true, to me.