somethingspecial | 32 [Voice]

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32 [Voice]

[There is the faintest tinkling of piano through the feed, forming the beginning of the finale to one of the best Broadway musicals of all time -- well, if you ask her anyway. A well-trained ear will be able to hear uneven breathing, very faintly -- but it stops, soon enough, as Rschel begins to sing.]

I'm limited...

[The quickest inhale of breath, as Rachel forces herself to speak the lines that melt in between the beautiful melodies of the song.]

Just look at me -- I'm limited...and just look at you, you can do all I couldn't do...Glinda...so now it's up to you... For the both of us. Now it's up to you...

[There is the slightest hitch of breath, as Rachel continues to play -- the moment of hesitation quickly being glossed over as Rachel begins to sing Glinda's role.]

I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason...bringing something we must learn and we are led to those that help us most to grow -- if we let them... and we help them in return...well, I don't know if I believe that's true -- but I know I'm who I am today, because I knew you...like a comet pulled from orbit as it passes a sun... like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood... who can say if I've been changed for the better? But because I knew you... I have been changed for good...

[The piano playing becomes more emphatic, stronger, more passionate, and when Rachel sings the next piece of the song, there is something very different about her voice. It is stronger, passionate -- it is the perfect fit -- because Rachel has reached Elphaba's piece of the famous duet and this is the role that she belongs in.]

It may well be that we will never meet again in this lifetime... so let me say before we part -- so much of me is made from what I learned from you -- you'll be with me, like a handprint on my heart -- and now whatever way our stories end -- I know that you have re-written mine by being my friend --

[Her voice chokes, ever so slightly, at the tail-end of the last note -- but Rachel is a professional and she sings through it bravely, not skipping a beat, despite her error.]

Like a ship that's blown from mooring by a wind off the sea -- like a seed dropped by a skybird in a distant wood -- who can say if I've been changed for the better? But because I knew you, I have been changed for good --

[A brief silence, as Rachel plays, before she delivers the next words with such emotion and heartbreak that it's almost entirely believable that she's singing on stage in front of a sold out crowd in the Gerswhin.]

And just to clear the air, I ask forgiveness for the things I've done you blame me for -- [the slightest pause, as Rachel switches roles seamlessly] -- but then I guess we know that there's blame to share -- and none of it seems to matter anymore -- !

[And her voice swells, as Rachel carries the note while playing the piano to keep up, before she sticks solely to Elphaba's role. There are numerous glitches -- singing that passionately while trying not to burst into tears is difficult, to say the least, but Rachel doesn't seem to care. Her perfectionism is lost in the moment, and she tries her best to continue with the song.]

Like a ship blown from it's mooring by a wind of the sea! Like a seed dropped by a skybird from in a distant wood! Who can say if I've been changed for the better -- ?

[And, suddenly, Rachel's voice softens, and so does the piano, into a quiet admission.]

... I do believe I have been changed for the better. And because I knew you... because I knew you... because I -- knew you... I have been changed...

[The final notes of the piece follow the last dying notes of the song as Rachel whispers the final two words.]

For good.

[There is a long silence, and it may almost appear that Rachel Berry has hung up on Adstringendum -- or that the recording was an accident -- before she continues quietly.]

Kurt Hummel has left Adstringendum.

[And the feed ends after that.]

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[She allows him to sit next to her, not really moving over that much. When he doesn't respond, Rachel doesn't speak -- though she looks over at him uncertainly when he reaches towards the piano keys, which causes her to put her own hands in her lap, to allow him the freedom to play whatever he wanted.

When she realizes what song it is -- and it only takes about four piano notes for Rachel's massive inner iTunes library to hunt it down -- her eyes suddenly well with tears. It feels like all she's done in the past four hours or so is cry -- but this feels somewhat different than the hysterics she had worked herself into when she discovered Kurt's PCD was offline.

She doesn't sing along -- she doesn't quite trust herself enough to do that -- but she does lean her head against his shoulder with a quiet sniff, to listen to him sing and play.

It's comforting. Which is what matters.]

[Her head on his shoulder makes him lean against her too, she's smaller than usual, or so it seems to him. His fingers drift over the keys, his voice dropping an octave or two, almost as if he wants this --- moment to be private, intimate. It's absurd, they are the only ones in the room anyway, but still]

No one's gonna hurt you,
No one's gonna dare.
Others can desert you,
Not to worry, whistle, I'll be there.

Demons will charm you with a smile, for a while,
But in time -

[At that he sends her a small smile]

Nothing can harm you
Not while I'm around...

[She's starting to smile, the tiniest tugs at the corners of her mouth, as Jesse continues to sing. She closes her eyes, which causes some of the tears to escape, but she isn't quite so miserable anymore. In fact, Rachel is beginning relax, ever so slightly, her breathing slow and even as she listens to the music, leaning into him a little bit more, not really seeming to mind that having her pressed against him must make piano playing difficult. After all, Rachel is a selfish creature by nature -- and this is much more important than piano playing, for the time being.

But that doesn't mean she isn't listening. And, for a moment, that weight in her heart is just a little bit lighter, because while Kurt may be gone, she still has Jesse and Blaine at her side, to keep her grounded, to remind her of home.

It doesn't hurt that Jesse is singing one of her favorite Barbra Streisand numbers, either.]

[Somehow, singing this song in the middle of no where with Rachel pressed against his shoulder is so meaningful - and he feels the familiar tug around his heart, the one that always happens when he realizes that this being in love with Rachel thing is probably never going to change. He moves to wrap one arm around her, bringing her closer. He cares more about her proximity than showing off his piano skills now anyway, his other hand is slowly drifting over the keys, playing the basic melody of the song that he sings, mouth pressed against her hair]

Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around -

[She lets herself be tugged closer, resting her head against his chest now as she keeps her eyes closed. It feels ridiculously calming -- and though ordinarily, Rachel would be positively indignant at Jesse only playing the basic melody to something sung by Barbra Streisand, she can't quite bring herself to really... care.

When the song winds down, Rachel is quiet, for a long moment, soaking in the comfort and the attention. She's no longer crying, and she's no longer smiling -- she just is. She's content, which is far more than she was ten minutes ago.

Soon, though, Rachel says something softly, eyes still closed, but she leans into him just a little bit more.]

I love you.

[It is amazingly intimate to have Rachel like this - relaxed more or less and there -

But then -

Her admission is pressed into his shirt, but it rings clear and loud in his ears like a roar of applause after a song. The room suddenly feels full - boarding on exploding, really, and for all his calm and cool demeanor he's sure she feels his heartbeat quickening.

Because she loves him, and she says it simply and with no big fuss or dramatic moment, they hadn't just won a big award or sang a beautiful duet, it's simple. But for all its simplicity it feels - like something thing very very big and deep and important - because it is]

I love you, Rachel Berry.

[She smiles a little bit -- because the best part about that statement is that she knows. It's a wonderfully freeing feeling, to know that you're loved. It's truly all she ever wanted.

She's quiet for a few more minutes, just -- curled against him and breathing, before she continues.]

You have to promise me that if you ever leave here, I'll see you again.

[Most people would have told Rachel that they can't promise her hat, that they can't control it, that it's not up to them, that it isn't fair. But Jesse is, after all, himself. He's Jesse St. James. And Rachel's admission - together along with this request, stirs something in him.

He shifted, his hand settling on the bottom of her chin to tilt her head up before he kissed her, not sweet nor light, but passionate - he and Rachel were both passionate about everything that they chose to do each other was not an exception. He kissed her in a way that spoke of a promise and security.

He didn't bother to keep much distance between them when he pulled back. A grin playing on his lips and a calm, confident tone to his voice]

I'll never risk missing all your drama.

[Her eyes open at the feeling of Jesse tilting her head and she looks almost confused, because really, it's just a yes or no question, and she had been extraordinarily comfortable. 8(

But then he kisses her.

Jesse always has such a way with causing Rachel to just forget about her problems whenever she's around him. He tends to pull out the best in Rachel, even when Rachel wants nothing more than to sit and stubbornly be miserable, thank you very much -- but he just refuses to allow her to do it. And that kiss seems to spark the tiniest bit of life back into Rachel's eyes and she even laughs at his answer, the tears still shimmering in her eyes, but the pain just a little bit better.]

Good answer.

[Jesse won't ever allow Rachel to be miserable, and usually he knows her well enough to get himself a smile. Her laugh is an award in itself and he smiles at her, half warm half playful]

Only the best for you -

[She grins a little bit before resting her head against his chest again, eyes drifting closed. She likes listening to his heartbeat.]

Flattery will get you everywhere.

With you? [His tone turns suggestive quite on purpose he knows she'll obliged to poke him for that]

You never know unless you try.

[It takes him a few seconds to realize that Rachel is flirting with him - she's teasing him. Teasing. Him. And it works so splendidly for a few seconds before he reasons that he can play too. His lips hover above hers before he grins]

You're lucky I'm a gentleman and won't take you on the challenge -

[She presses her lips against his with a smile before making herself comfortable again. 8(]

Naturally.

I really am naturally modest to not need to prove myself - [Chuckles]

[That gets the tiniest nudge to his ribs.]

You are anything but modest.

I have no idea what possesses you to say something this cruel -

The truth hurts, Jesse.

Your ego is the size of Utah.

[Snickers]

I find the analogy insulting, you should at least choose a more epic country -

Texas.

[She grins into his shirt a little, though.]

Or California.

California sounds better -

It would, though I think Texas strikes a larger image.

A larger boring image -

[She rolls her eyes.]

You and your need to have everything be exciting.

[Not that she isn't the same way, of course.]

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32 [Voice]

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