Rachel Berry (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
somethingspecial) wrote2011-07-14 12:01 am
somethingspecial) wrote2011-07-14 12:01 am
Entry tags:
- !event: filter failure,
- !event: power failure,
- blaine: my other gay friend,
- bringing the music to adstringendum,
- broadway references are the best,
- caution: diva at work,
- feeling a little bit better disney is th,
- godmodes are really funny,
- let's sing about our feelings,
- music is the universal language,
- oh to be human again,
- renovating the old theatre,
- trolling the general population
33 [Video]
[There is only the briefest flash of dark brown hair as Rachel Berry turns on the PCD and races through the aisles to the stage of the theatre that she has been renovating -- and re-renovating. It appears most of it is cleaned up, from the flood, though there is still some obvious damage... but the stage is clear, which is all that really matters. For a moment, all is quiet, until two figures appear on the stage -- Blaine Anderson and Rachel Berry.
It’s Rachel that speaks first, clasping our hands together with a bright and cheery grin, her voice carrying perfectly throughout the stage.]
Excuse me! It has come to our attention that many of you have been struck deaf, blind, and dumb from this recent event, which has apparently transformed all of you into perfectly normal and defenseless human beings. While I am certain this is a tragedy for most of you, it is actually quite the relief to most of us -- so, without further ado, Blaine and I would like to dedicate this performance to the normal people of the city who can finally get a good night’s sleep.
[And she clears her throat.]
[Blaine takes a small step forward on stage, taking Rachel’s hand as he does so she moves with him. Once he’s moved, he turns to face her and, with a smile, he speaks his first few lines before the song is supposed to begin.]
Ha ha, oui, my friends; the day we have waited for may be at hand!
[Rachel grins at the words before she turns to face him, rocking forward on her toes slightly in excitement before she follows up with her next lines.]
Oh, if only that were true, Lumiere!
[He lets out a soft sigh as he turns more toward the camera.]
Aaah...human again.
[Rachel mirrors his reaction to a T as she, too, sighs wistfully and looks out towards the empty audience.]
Human again...
[Blaine offers her a quick glance once more before letting go of her hand and dropping both of his to the side.]
Yes, think of what that means...
[He takes a deep breath and begins to sing. He drags the first two words of the phrase out before continuing the rest at a normal pace. As Blaine performs, he moves across the stage, trying to act out as best as he can the things described in the song.]
I'll be cooking again! Be good-looking again! With a mademoiselle on each arm --
[He offers the camera a quick wiggle of his very triangular eyebrows while singing this line before continuing.]
When I'm human again! Only human again! Poised and polished and gleaming with charm...I'll be courting again! Chic and sporting again!
[Rachel laughs, as she claps her hands along to the silent background music, watching Blaine dance around the stage as she sings the next piece.]
Which should cause several husbands alarm!
[And then Rachel steps to one side, and her voice becomes slightly higher, to take on a new role in the production -- after all, it’s only the two of them, and someone has to play Chip.]
I’ll hop down off the shelf!
[Blaine stops his dancing for a moment to face Rachel again and he extends his arm toward her in a dramatic manner.]
And toute suite, be myself!
[Rachel takes his hand with a grin to be pulled closer, spinning neatly before arriving on his other side, still holding his hand.]
Oh, I can’t wait to be human again!
[It’s then that Rachel lets go of Blaine’s hand to move quickly across the stage, producing a hand mirror from a drawer of a table, raising it to eye-level to look at herself critically. Her singing voice becomes a little higher, and definitely more pretentious, as she takes on yet another role.]
When we're human again! Only human again! When we're knickknacks and what-nots no more!
[She puts the mirror behind her back to return to Chip’s previous singing voice with a grin.]
Little push, little shove; they could, whoosh! Fall in love!
[And out comes the mirror again with a laugh.]
Ah, cherie, won't it all be top-drawer! I'll wear lipstick and rouge! And I won't be so huge! Why, I'll easily fit through that door -- I'll exude savior-faire! I'll wear gowns! I'll have hair! It's my prayer to be human again!
[Blaine steps toward center stage once more, this time straightening up his blazer as he begins his next few lines. He’s also dragging a chair with him and he places it in front of him before he starts singing, this time with an attempt at a stuffy English accent.]
When I'm human again! Only human again! When the world once more making sense -- I'll unwind for a change!
[Rachel puts a mouth to her hands to try not to laugh, before she manages her own atrocious French accent.]
Wouldn’t that be strange!
[He looks over at her, with a mock glare.]
Can I help it if I’m t-t-tense?!
[He turns away from her, his smile once again returning as he starts to step up on the chair, swaying to the imaginary music around him.]
In a shack by the sea, I'll sit back sipping tea -- Let my early retirement commence! Far from fool made of wax -- I'll get down to brass tacks and relax!
[As he says the last line, he jumps over the top of the chair in an excited manner (a nearly high school musical way if people would recognize it). Once he lands, he quickly pulls the chair to the side and joins Rachel again for the rest of the song.
Together, the sing the rest of the song as a duet -- though Rachel seems to have procured brooms for each of them to use as they waltz around one another, cleaning the stage in time with their singing.]
When I'm human again -- So sweep the dust from the floor! Let's let some light in the room! I can feel, I can tell, someone might break the spell Any day now!
[Rachel points the broom dramatically off stage, with a laugh, before she melts back into character.]
Shine up the brass on the door! Alert the dustpail and the broom!
[And Blaine joins her in her sweeping and cleaning as they resume singing together, in more or less perfect pitch and harmony, though it is interrupted by the occassional laugh and swat of a broom by either one of them at any given moment.]
If all goes as planned, our time may be at hand, any day now! Open the shutters and let in some air! Put these here and put those over there! Sweep up the years, of sadness and tears and throw them away!
[Blaine has found himself on top of the table, extending a hand to Rachel to join him. She takes his hand with a grin and is pulled up rather easily, broom still in hand, as they sing.]
When we're human again, only human again -- When the girl finally sets us all free! Cheeks a-bloomin' again -- we're assumin' again -- we'll resume our long lost joie de vie! We'll be playin' again, holiday' again, and we're prayin' it's A-S-A-P!
[Blaine jumps off the table and turns to catch Rachel as she follows suit, spinning her neatly before setting her on her feet, so they can both sing the finale.]
When we cast off this pall, we'll stand straight, we'll walk tall, when we're all that we were! Thanks to him, thanks to her, coming closer and closer, and closer and...
[Rachel grabs Blaine’s hands and together, they drop the brooms, and waltz across the stage, clearly not taking this seriously anymore, but they are still singing the finale, dancing and whirling around with -- well, ease, across the stage. They have clearly rehearsed this.]
We'll be dancing again! We'll be twirling again! We'll be whirling around with such ease! When we're human again, only human again, we'll go waltzing those old one-two-threes! We'll be floating again! We'll be gliding again! Stepping, striding as fine as you please! Like a real human does, I'll be all that I was! On that glorious morn, when we're finally reborn, and we're all of us human again!
[As soon as they are finished singing, Rachel breaks into laughter before she hugs Blaine tightly. They spin for a few times in the center of the stage before Blaine jerks his head towards the camera, taking Rachel's hand, and offering Adstringendum a bow before they both break into laughter again.]
It’s Rachel that speaks first, clasping our hands together with a bright and cheery grin, her voice carrying perfectly throughout the stage.]
Excuse me! It has come to our attention that many of you have been struck deaf, blind, and dumb from this recent event, which has apparently transformed all of you into perfectly normal and defenseless human beings. While I am certain this is a tragedy for most of you, it is actually quite the relief to most of us -- so, without further ado, Blaine and I would like to dedicate this performance to the normal people of the city who can finally get a good night’s sleep.
[And she clears her throat.]
[Blaine takes a small step forward on stage, taking Rachel’s hand as he does so she moves with him. Once he’s moved, he turns to face her and, with a smile, he speaks his first few lines before the song is supposed to begin.]
Ha ha, oui, my friends; the day we have waited for may be at hand!
[Rachel grins at the words before she turns to face him, rocking forward on her toes slightly in excitement before she follows up with her next lines.]
Oh, if only that were true, Lumiere!
[He lets out a soft sigh as he turns more toward the camera.]
Aaah...human again.
[Rachel mirrors his reaction to a T as she, too, sighs wistfully and looks out towards the empty audience.]
Human again...
[Blaine offers her a quick glance once more before letting go of her hand and dropping both of his to the side.]
Yes, think of what that means...
[He takes a deep breath and begins to sing. He drags the first two words of the phrase out before continuing the rest at a normal pace. As Blaine performs, he moves across the stage, trying to act out as best as he can the things described in the song.]
I'll be cooking again! Be good-looking again! With a mademoiselle on each arm --
[He offers the camera a quick wiggle of his very triangular eyebrows while singing this line before continuing.]
When I'm human again! Only human again! Poised and polished and gleaming with charm...I'll be courting again! Chic and sporting again!
[Rachel laughs, as she claps her hands along to the silent background music, watching Blaine dance around the stage as she sings the next piece.]
Which should cause several husbands alarm!
[And then Rachel steps to one side, and her voice becomes slightly higher, to take on a new role in the production -- after all, it’s only the two of them, and someone has to play Chip.]
I’ll hop down off the shelf!
[Blaine stops his dancing for a moment to face Rachel again and he extends his arm toward her in a dramatic manner.]
And toute suite, be myself!
[Rachel takes his hand with a grin to be pulled closer, spinning neatly before arriving on his other side, still holding his hand.]
Oh, I can’t wait to be human again!
[It’s then that Rachel lets go of Blaine’s hand to move quickly across the stage, producing a hand mirror from a drawer of a table, raising it to eye-level to look at herself critically. Her singing voice becomes a little higher, and definitely more pretentious, as she takes on yet another role.]
When we're human again! Only human again! When we're knickknacks and what-nots no more!
[She puts the mirror behind her back to return to Chip’s previous singing voice with a grin.]
Little push, little shove; they could, whoosh! Fall in love!
[And out comes the mirror again with a laugh.]
Ah, cherie, won't it all be top-drawer! I'll wear lipstick and rouge! And I won't be so huge! Why, I'll easily fit through that door -- I'll exude savior-faire! I'll wear gowns! I'll have hair! It's my prayer to be human again!
[Blaine steps toward center stage once more, this time straightening up his blazer as he begins his next few lines. He’s also dragging a chair with him and he places it in front of him before he starts singing, this time with an attempt at a stuffy English accent.]
When I'm human again! Only human again! When the world once more making sense -- I'll unwind for a change!
[Rachel puts a mouth to her hands to try not to laugh, before she manages her own atrocious French accent.]
Wouldn’t that be strange!
[He looks over at her, with a mock glare.]
Can I help it if I’m t-t-tense?!
[He turns away from her, his smile once again returning as he starts to step up on the chair, swaying to the imaginary music around him.]
In a shack by the sea, I'll sit back sipping tea -- Let my early retirement commence! Far from fool made of wax -- I'll get down to brass tacks and relax!
[As he says the last line, he jumps over the top of the chair in an excited manner (a nearly high school musical way if people would recognize it). Once he lands, he quickly pulls the chair to the side and joins Rachel again for the rest of the song.
Together, the sing the rest of the song as a duet -- though Rachel seems to have procured brooms for each of them to use as they waltz around one another, cleaning the stage in time with their singing.]
When I'm human again -- So sweep the dust from the floor! Let's let some light in the room! I can feel, I can tell, someone might break the spell Any day now!
[Rachel points the broom dramatically off stage, with a laugh, before she melts back into character.]
Shine up the brass on the door! Alert the dustpail and the broom!
[And Blaine joins her in her sweeping and cleaning as they resume singing together, in more or less perfect pitch and harmony, though it is interrupted by the occassional laugh and swat of a broom by either one of them at any given moment.]
If all goes as planned, our time may be at hand, any day now! Open the shutters and let in some air! Put these here and put those over there! Sweep up the years, of sadness and tears and throw them away!
[Blaine has found himself on top of the table, extending a hand to Rachel to join him. She takes his hand with a grin and is pulled up rather easily, broom still in hand, as they sing.]
When we're human again, only human again -- When the girl finally sets us all free! Cheeks a-bloomin' again -- we're assumin' again -- we'll resume our long lost joie de vie! We'll be playin' again, holiday' again, and we're prayin' it's A-S-A-P!
[Blaine jumps off the table and turns to catch Rachel as she follows suit, spinning her neatly before setting her on her feet, so they can both sing the finale.]
When we cast off this pall, we'll stand straight, we'll walk tall, when we're all that we were! Thanks to him, thanks to her, coming closer and closer, and closer and...
[Rachel grabs Blaine’s hands and together, they drop the brooms, and waltz across the stage, clearly not taking this seriously anymore, but they are still singing the finale, dancing and whirling around with -- well, ease, across the stage. They have clearly rehearsed this.]
We'll be dancing again! We'll be twirling again! We'll be whirling around with such ease! When we're human again, only human again, we'll go waltzing those old one-two-threes! We'll be floating again! We'll be gliding again! Stepping, striding as fine as you please! Like a real human does, I'll be all that I was! On that glorious morn, when we're finally reborn, and we're all of us human again!
[As soon as they are finished singing, Rachel breaks into laughter before she hugs Blaine tightly. They spin for a few times in the center of the stage before Blaine jerks his head towards the camera, taking Rachel's hand, and offering Adstringendum a bow before they both break into laughter again.]
[Video]
[Video] 1/2
[Video] 2/3
[She sounds scandalized.]
Are you aware that the Broadway circuit of theatres has been present in New York City since 1750? That it has been a cultural epicentre of American genius since the mid-eighteenth century? Without Broadway, America would have no voice. Granted, in the beginning, they mostly only performed Shakespearean plays and classic operas -- though opera was not popular on the Broadway circuit until the early nineteenth century -- but then -- then -- The Black Crook opened on September 16th, 1822, with what is known as the very first musical. Did you know that it was over five hours in length, but it held a record four hundred and seventy four performances? People came from all across the country to see these people sing and perform something that the public had never seen before -- the beauty of theatre and music mashed together into a musical.
However, the real peak of Broadway was after the Great Depression, leading into the beginning World War II era, following the fallout of the event, with classics such as Oklahoma! and Singing in the Rain. These performances helped carry a country through a war. They pulled a broken country together with music and art and no matter who you were or what class you were from or what color you were, you could properly celebrate in the music. Oh, and let's not forget that even past this Golden Age of musical theatre, Broadway still sells millions of tickets and makes billions of dollars in revenue every year.
And history aside, sir, music is beauty in its most pure artform. Music lives, breathes, and cries humanity -- it is the human spirit. Music has been powering the human condition since cavemen were rolling around rocks and making stones and to be on a stage is one of the greatest honors you couldever have and to say that Broadway is small and relatively unimportant is not only an insult, but untrue, and you should be ashamed of yourself for every saying such a slanderous statement.
[Video]
And what about the stars of Broadway? The very men and women who brought inspiration to individuals such as me, the future stars of the craft? Where would the world be without Angela Lansbury, Grace Kelly -- Barbra Streisand!
[And Rachel seems to get very serious over this.]
Barbra Streisand is a goddess. She is one of the few women today who unabashedly is who she is without regret or remorse and she -- she -- is the true embodiment of Broadway. She has starred in numerous production, she has recorded thirty-five studio albums, and she did it all when every single individual who met her when she was younger told her that she could do nothing due to her looks and appearance. But did she back down? No. She told them to take that nose job and shove it and she moved on to star in Funny Girl, which became a motion picture, which earned her an Oscar. Do you know where anyone would be without Barbra Streisand? They would be living a meaningless life without joy and beauty because they have never listened to her sing.
[DEEP. BREATH.]
Barbra Streisand has won two Academy Awards, eight Grammy Awards, four Emmy Awards, a Special Tony Award, the American Film Institute Award, and a Peabody Award.
What have you done?
[Video]
Right now, just. He's staring. With an expression that can only be described as "wat".]
[Video]
[DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.]
[Video]
[Video]
I am enlightening him.
[Video]
[Video]
[She is totally taking you seriously.]
[Video]
You just may be the most passionate woman I've ever met.
[Video]
[8)]
[Video]
As you stated in the beginning of your long-winded and ultimately unnecessary history lesson, Broadway began only a few hundred years ago. If you are unaware, the universe began approximately 13.7 billion years ago. The human species began 2 million years ago, recorded human history over six thousand years ago.
Of all things done over time, should I bother to make a list of the many things I have both seen and been involved in, it would take a long time even for me to get to Broadway.
Also, most notably as of late I was involved in stopping the Apocalypse.
[Video]
[Rachel swings her arms wide to gesture around her, eyebrows raised so high they may very well be hidden by her bangs.]
Good job.
[Video]
Not here, clearly. But there is no Broadway here, either.
[Video]
[... SHUT UP WITH YOUR LOGIC.]
And there is no Broadway yet.
[Video]
And a second one has already been prevented.
[Video]
So, if what you say is true, the Animus aren't very good at the end of times.
[THIS FACE.]
And you do realize that preventing your Apocalypse prevented Broadway from being destroyed as well, right?
[Video]
A great deal about the Apocalypse was different from what was foretold. Across worlds, it may be even more so.
I fail to see the point or relevancy of that. It prevented various other structures and establishments from destruction also.
[Video]
You do fail to see a lot of things.
[/WHATEVER]
[Video]
[Video]
[SO THERE.]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]
[Video]